Ok so background…this blog was posted on another platform June 13th 2014. At the we were living in Lake Elsinore, California. This is one post that I don’t intend to add much into the meat of it , but expand upon it….it has withstood the test of time.
A post I read on the internet today got me thinking. (I wish I had mentioned what the post was) In the end I came to the conclusion that I am very proud of my maternal extended family. (I am also very proud of my paternal family as well, for many reasons, but this one applies as well) As a child I never quite understood just how amazing they were at unconditional love, but as an adult their love astounds me.
You see our family is truly a mixed bag. We have different professions, politics, interests, etc. However it goes deeper than that. We are also made up of a vast mix of DNA sequences. Meaning that we are not all “Blood” relatives. You might be thinking that this is true of many families. Of course the people who marry are not blood relatives (well hopefully not). I mean to say that some of the children that entered this family were not “blood”, but my family taught me that blood doesn’t matter. Love does.
I have seen many people discuss how families coming together in this way can be a disaster. Unfortunately I think most of the time this is true. We fail to see past the blood lines and forget that a human being is there. My family never made significant differences between the genetically linked relatives and the non genetically linked ones. This led to what I believe to be a beautifully cohesive and loving family. Oh of course we have our disputes and our problems, but at the end of the day we love and care for one another deeply.
A family is not just made by the combining of DNA sequences, but also by the acceptance and love towards one another.
We are not perfect, but I am so proud to call these people my family. I wish that I had understood as a child and teenager just how magical their love is.
This is so true and I want to elaborate on it. My mothers biological father was tragically taken in a car accident when my grandmother was pregnant. The man who took his place, who raised 2 bonus daughters as if they were his own blood, is an amazing father, grandfather, and great-grandfather. As an adult I have so much respect for the fact that he has never once made any of us feel lesser. Even after he and my grandmother divorced, there was never any thought of us being less of a family. His new wife has joined the family with just as much patience and love with our crazy crew.
After this divorce, my grandmother married a man who has also been one of the best grandfathers a girl could ask for. I have so many fond memories of jogging with him, golfing, and working around the family motel. I used to tell people I was so lucky…I had six amazing grandparents and while some are no longer with me, I appreciate every second I have had with them.
I also had various “uncles” who were great men that came into our life in various ways. I still remember my Uncle Manuel teaching me about photography. He would bring books to me and helped inspire a lifelong hobby in me. My Uncle Curt…he was like a big brother to me. As we have aged we haven’t exactly seen eye to eye, but who was a large positive part of my youth…from birth until my 20’s.
These people, and many others, helped shape how I think of families. While I love my blood family, I also love those people that I have invited into my life despite any biological connection. The childhood experiences have taught me that being blood does not give one a free for all excuse card to be toxic. I will invite people into my inner sanctum who I trust and have earned their way there showing their mutual love and devotion for myself and my family. A devotion that I gladly return.
I enjoy my village…the amazing blood relatives and all the bonus ones that I have been blessed with. If I do not say it enough…I love and appreciate you.
Currently listening to: “Africa”- Weezer cover
Currently Reading (for the second time): Eragon by Christopher Paolini